Unemployed Man Refuses to Leave Elementary School

A Manhattan man is in psychiatric care after repeatedly refusing to vacate school premises after dropping off his kids. The unidentified 43-year-old, jobless for the second time in three years, claims that he is simply fulfilling his obligation as an emotionally accessible father. However, the sons, ages seven and four, claim they have “absolutely no need” for their father’s continued presence at school. “He’s always trying to make jokes and hug me goodbye for, like, twenty minutes,” said the seven-year-old. “Why can’t he just go to work like other dads?” echoed the four-year-old, making an “L” gesture with his fingers for “loser.” School officials acknowledged the issue but declined to comment.